Posts Tagged ‘excuse’
Don’t fear the odd hair, tame it
According to Garrett Pike from New York’s high-end Martial Vivot Salon Pour Hommes , clients are constantly asking him about hairy trouble spots. “Definitely don’t be embarrassed to talk about stray hairs with your barber,” he advises. It’s like the doctor; he’s heard it all. and what you may think is odd is actually quite normal.
but that doesn’t mean you have an excuse for not taking care of stray hairs. here, our expert reveals the best ways to deal with common problem areas so you’ll never have a girl look at you like you’re a Neanderthal again.
Nose
Pike recommends skipping nose trimmers: “I usually do everything with the scissor just because it feels better.” Pick up a small pair of scissors with a curved tip, which will help you get into the nose better. “As long as you cut around the nostril, it looks good. A lot of people tend to go up pretty far, but what really matters is getting anything that’s hanging out.”
Toe and finger knuckles
Pike attacks his hand- and toe-fur with either scissors (the same ones for the nose), targeting the really long hairs, or with hair clippers on the ’1′ setting. “That’s a pretty standard length, but you might want to take it shorter if you have really black hair.”
Ears
According to Pike, asking your barber to take the hair out of your ears is a completely normal request. and it’s convenient: You’ll need to trim ear hair every four to six weeks, which is the average time between haircuts anyway. If you choose to take care of the strays at home, your tactic depends on how many you’ve got. Use tweezers if you have only a couple of hairs. Otherwise, clippers that resemble a T (rather than a square) will do the job: “They have that extra corner on it to get into the weird areas of the ear.”
Cheeks
Shaving up to your eyes isn’t the answer, says Pike. On the other hand, tweezing hurts, especially if you have a lot of hair. If you’re looking for a pain-free approach, use a really tight trimmer.
Back of neck
This is one of the harder areas to manage, simply because you can’t see it.
The solution: Hold a mirror in one hand in front of you and stand with a mirror behind you. If you decide to use a trimmer, attack your neck before getting in the shower, since the machine won’t be completely efficient on slick hair. “If you’re going to use a razor, definitely do it wet after getting out of the shower,” says Pike. Trimming won’t get as close as a razor would, he adds, but it’ll do the job if you’re in a hurry.
Bacon Flavored Toothpaste. And We Wonder Why We’re Fat…
If you’re sitting in your sister’s basement, playing Xbox, find yourself fearful of sunlight, and wonder why the girls have stopped coming around–this toothpaste, along with everything I’ve aforementioned, is probably why. unfortunately, this toothpaste actually exists. I mean, it could be a good excuse if someone tells you that your breath smells bad. all you have to say is that the fault rests with your toothpaste.
But if you plan on having friends, or anyone really, within 10 feet of you — for god’s sake please don’t think this is an acceptable idea. if you decide to be the asshole that buys it, it’s available at mcphee.com for $4.50 a tube. Personally, I think it would make a really good prank. (Squeeze out the person’s regular minty toothpaste, and pour in the bacon flavored one.)
Know someone whose trying to lose weight? are you trying to lose weight? it could also be beneficial to our obese friends who can’t seem to lay off the bacon. Try brushing your teeth with bacon flavored toothpaste. That way, you’re cutting your calories and still getting your nasty fix, ya sicko. Or you could just try that new lipstick that helps you lose weight — the glue stick. (Please, don’t actually take these suggestions.)
If you do purchase it, please do not eat the toothpaste, fry the toothpaste, or use it as a condiment. In fact, don’t use it period, unless you like the idea of being a 60-year-old virgin whose only friend is your cat. The toothpaste comes in a variety of flavors, including pickle, bacon, and cupcake. #wannaknowwhyyourefat?
Is homosexuality really just an excuse to spread AIDS?
My grandma says it all the time, do you think it's true?
I think AIDS are just an excuse for your grandmother's bigotry.
why would anyone WANT to spread a life threatening disease?
Gradma's wrong.
im sorry girl but your grandma is stupid and a bytch who needs to die now
what a sick-minded assumption is this?
Is your grandmother's ignorance just an excuse to spread hate?
No…
Of course not
Has your grandmother been tested for AIDS.. You'd be surprised how many straight people have it! maybe your grandmother got it from grandpa who is on the DL ?
No, homosexuality is about love and attraction. Most gays use protection and do their best NOT to spread AIDS.
Your grandma is…you need to talk to her.
No, no offense but your grandma is ignorant.
your gram is old in her way of thinking….and very wrong…its to bad your family had that as an influence on you guys lives…..hopefully not all of your family members are as twisted as she is…
I think your grandma is a bigot, or bizarrely confused, or you are just a troll. either way, it isn't, and sex in general can spread any STD, heterosexual or not.
Sure, that's it, we decided to give a deadly disease to straight people by infecting ourselves.
Next . . .
yes. everyone thinks that just because someone is gay or lesbian they'll get aids. and that's not true. like you said it's an excuse. women can get it from a man or vise versa. you can get it from doing drugs. you can get it from getting a tatto if not done properly or from misuse of blood transfusion.
Tell your grandmother that, statistically speaking, more straight people have AIDS, nowadays.
Grandma needs some intelligence.
AIDS can and does affect anyone, it's not restricted to gay folks, so your grandma (if she even exists) is wrong.
Of course not :S
It is something a few people are born with and nobody chooses to be homosexual.
It is just a natural thing
No. AIDS affects all cultures and communities. Your grandmother would get short shrift in Africa. AIDS is devastating many communities around the world. the gay community is just one of them.
No it's not… Gays just want to have friends and have their lifestyle (s).. they are just not out to spread AIDS nor harm anyone..
Proper protection should be exercised by all – not only within the gay community. Life is precious… If you enjoy sexual escapades, do it so that it / they will allow you to be a participant for many more years to come..
Rachelle In High Heels
Yes i think so.